I Love This Bar
by Golden-Sama
Summary: [Hiatus]. Early Series. Vash and the Girls find themselves in a small bar with a beautiful bartender named Annie. Vash is hired as her bodyguard, and the girls get jobs at the Saloon! But is Annie really just after the reward? Slight VashMeryl.
1. Winners and Losers

**I** Lo_v_**e** **T**h**is** **B**_a_r

**By **

**Golden-sama**

**Rated**: PG-13 for Violence, Mild Profanity, and Adult Situations

**Summary**: Early Series. Vash and the Girls find themselves in a small bar with a beautiful bartender named Annie. Vash is hired as he bodyguard, and the girls get jobs at the Saloon! But is Annie really just after the reward? Slight VashMeryl. R&R would be nice.

**Disclaimer**: I don't own **_Trigun_©®™**. It belongs to Sunrise and all other respected owners. Nor do I own the title "**_I Love This Bar_**"©®™, which belongs to Toby Keith.

I do own **Annie©**, **Keith©**, and the **Big Bad K's©**.

**A/N**: Yes, it's here, my first Trigun story!

-Applause sign lights up-

Heh. Now I've become somewhat famous in the Witch Hunter Robin category here, and now I've decided to take a crack at writing a Trigun fic.

Anywho. This one takes place in the **early** series. Sometime between Episodes 4 and 5 if you want an exact time.

That means no Wolfwood or Legato.

And I know that right now tons of fangirls just clicked the back button and fled this story. XD

Well for those of you who have stayed, I think you'll enjoy this. It's a time travel ride back to when Trigun was simple. Humor and Action blended together with a hint of sexual tension.

  
Well I speak too much. Onto the story!

**----------------------**

It was no more than just a small saloon. There were millions upon millions of small saloons like that all over the planet, spanning the colossal deserts and barren wastelands. The yellow sands gleamed in the sun like a field of sparkling golden jewels. Of course right now it was a swirling blackness of nighttime and instead of a gleaming golden field that stretched across the entire world, it was a blackened brownish-hue color. The small saloon that was stretched in the middle of the brown desert was filled with people.

People of all shapes and sizes. Large, drunk cowboys singing and laughing, local outlaws sitting at the table, playing poker and trading rumors about legendary gunfighters like "The Groom", "David Rica", and of course, the most legendary of all, "Vash the Stampede".

Admits all the outlaws, rouges, bounty hunters and treasure seekers; was a woman. Not any ordinary woman, she was the bartender here at this saloon, and she was also very beautiful. Her long blonde hair was curly and flowed down her back and came cascading around her neck, making a perfect portrait of her rosy-cheeked face. Her skin was a creamy-white that felt like silk and housed her tiny round nose, and eyes, a deep midnight blue that men could get lost in.

She was decked out in a barrage of reds and purples in her large barmaid skirt that hugged her chest and fanned out into a large frilly dress. The locals all knew her as "Victoria" and most of them came in to see her, especially when it was cold like tonight.

The saloon doors opened and a man walked inside. He was short and stocky, but built like a rhino. His skin was suntanned, some places a light tan, others a dark brown. Beneath his stubbly nose was a deep brown mustache that fanned down over his face and connected with his equally coco colored beard. His eyes were hidden in the shade cast from his chocolate-colored hat. 

And then a lot of things happened at once.

The man who had entered the bar drew a large black revolver from beneath his tan traveling cloak that he wore over his vest and aimed it directly across the bar towards the blonde barmaid called Victoria, who gave a scared scream. The town Sheriff, who as 'luck' would have it was in the bar at the time (being a big fan of the beautiful Victoria) jumped to his feet and pulled his own gun, but the outlaw in brown turned and fired a shot into the aged policeman's chest, sending him back onto the ground with a grunt and a spatter of blood.

The outlaw in brown jumped upward and landed on the other side of the bar, with his left hand he grabbed the barmaid by her arm, pulling her into his chest, and with his right arm he lifted his large black revolver to her head and pressed it forcibly into her temple.

"Move and the bitch will feel a chunk of hot lead in her brain." He growled in all seriousness, and many people who had drawn their guns stopped and looked around nervously. Everyone in the bar liked Victoria. Some because she was nice, some because she was beautiful. None of them made a move to attack the brown-wearing bandit, for fear of killing Victoria.

The bandit whispered something in Victoria's ear and she went over to the counter and pulled out a small tin box that was used to store the money, all of this while crying quietly with a gun still on the back of her head. It took only a few moments for the bandit and the barmaid to make their way outside without any more trouble.

The operation had gone perfectly.

**----**

A_c_t** I**: **W_i_nn_e_**r**s **andL**ose_r_**s

**----**

**Th**r_ee_ **M**onth**s** L_a_**t**_e_r

**-**_Orborio__Town_**-******

Orborio was just a small Gunsmoke town in the seemingly endless desert that covered most of the world. It was home to nothing or no one of any real importance, and there was no one there who really significant in any way. There were no famous gunsmiths, no famous outlaws, and no famous sheriffs. It had once been famous because an outlaw named Rica had claimed his one hundredth victim in a bank robbery here, but that was so long ago no one remembered but historians.  
  
There was, however, a large saloon which had recently hired a new barmaid named Annie, who was gorgeous. Her blonde hair, creamy-white skin, and midnight blue eyes made her the talk of the town. Which didn't really mean much since Orborio was a small town, but people still liked to talk about her. She was a real treasure, since most barmaids were ugly and old.

Although today in the small saloon that the beautiful Annie worked in there was quite a talk, and it wasn't talk about the barmaid or her . . . beer jugs, nor was it talk about a famous outlaw like Rica who had lived and died years ago. It was talk about an outlaw alright, but an outlaw who was far from dead and forgotten.   
  
It was the greatest outlaw of all.

Of course it wasn't just rouges, bandits, and bounty hunters after the sixty-billion double-dollar reward that were speaking and listening to the rumors about 'The Humanoid Typhoon'. Admits all the overweight scoundrels and bearded bounty hunters sat two young women who were more interested in Vash than anyone else.

Meryl Strife and Milly Thompson sat across from one another at the bar, not far from where the barmaid was pouring drinks to a scruffy looking outlaw dressed all in brown who made no business of hiding the large black revolver that hung from his belt.

  
"Excuse me." The dark-haired, shorter of the two women suddenly piped up. She sat in a small chair, a half-eaten banana sundae before her, but her eyes were turned to the poker table beside here where many bounty hunters and bandits sat, discussing Vash. "Do you know what Vash looks like?"

"Vash the stampede?" One of the outlaws blinked as Meryl questioned him. "Yeah, I've seen 'em before. He's a tall man with blonde hair and a red cape. He carries a big sword and is as big as a house!"

"No!" A second outlaw shouted. "He's a midget with a shotgun I tell ya'!"  
  


"The hell 'e is." A third outlaw spat as he let his chewing tobacco fall onto the ground. "Vash the Stampede is a twelve-foot tall man with dark eyes and a red coat. He carries a gun so big it would take twenty men to lift it!"  
  


"You're crazy! If it takes twenty men how does he lift it?"  
  
"He's the Humanoid Typhoon!"

Meryl shook her head in failure as the three bandits broke off into arguments and curses and she turned back to Milly, who seemed oblivious to three arguing outlaws and was instead just sipping her tea quietly.

"We've got no luck, do we Mil'?" Meryl sighed quietly as she let her head fall into her open hands, her elbows tucked on the table tightly.

  
"Gee Meryl." Milly's light-headed voice responded. "It's not like you to give up."  
  


"I'm _not_ giving up." Meryl snapped back. "I just think we need to find better rumors." 

"Hey Meryl." Milly said in her same dreamy voice as she finished off her tea and set the glass down on the table. "What about that weird blonde guy?"  
  


Meryl's right eyes twitched with annoyance at the mere mention of 'that weird blonde guy', as he had become known to the two Insurance Agents. Milly insisted that he fit the rumors (most of them) perfectly, and that he had gotten them out of some tight jams, but Meryl wouldn't even begin to believe he was Vash.   
  
Vash was a deadly, ruthless gunfighter so strong the devil would run from him. Vash didn't know the word mercy or compassion. Vash was a killer who had once turned a city of one million into ash.

That idiot was just a fool with dumb luck and a perverted streak.

"Don't start Milly. Oh come on; let's get out of this stupid saloon. We're not going to find Vash in here."  
  


But as the smaller woman stood to, the short and stocky man wearing all brown who had been waiting for his drink stood up, a big black revolver in his hand and a snarl on his tanned lips. One of the outlaws nearest to him raised his own gun (obviously not liking someone else having a bigger gun than he), but the brown bandit turned and fired a shot into the outlaw, which caused a scream from Annie and silence from everyone else.

  
Silence except for the sounds of many guns being drawn.

The brown bandit jumped up and flipped behind the counter, landing beside Annie and grabbing her with his left and pulling her close to him, while he used his right hand to press the gun to her head.

"Alright, no one move!" He growled. "I mean it!"

And no one did move. Meryl and Milly, who had both sat down the second the shooting started, cast their worried eyes at the crying blonde girl who was struggling against the brown bandit's grasp, but it seemed impossible to escape. She had tears in her midnight blue eyes, but Meryl couldn't help but notice that she had a small smirk on her lips, and the dark-haired Insurance agent found that peculiar. Very peculiar.

After a few moments of silence, the bandit had forced Annie to grab the small tin box that housed the bar's money and the two of them were now at the front door. The revolver was still pressed against then blonde woman's forehead.

  
"If any of you follow me, the girl dies." The brown bandit growled.

He slowly began to walk backward, pulling Annie with him.

And then he bumped into someone, who gave a cry and fell down the steps of the saloon. The bandit growled and turned around, aiming his revolver still at the woman, but aiming his eyes at the man on the ground.

  
Talk about a weirdo. The man was tall with the most bizarre blonde haircut the bandit had ever seen. Dressed all in red, with brown boots and gloves, and come to think of it one of his entire arms seemed to be covered in a huge glove. The blonde man sat up and rubbed his head.

"Jeez, you could be a little more gentle you kn—squeeee!"

Suddenly the blonde man's deep pond green eyes spotted Annie and he seemed to overlook the fact a bandit was pointing a gun at her head. All he could see was a beautiful woman. He jumped to his feet and suddenly his face seemed to sparkle. He reached out his hands and clapped them over one of her own petite hands.

"If you don't mind my saying, you're gorgeous." The man said in a new voice. Not the whiny complaining voice he'd used before, but a big, macho voice.

"Meryl!" Milly whispered to her friend from where they still sat at their table.

  
"I know." Meryl snapped back, her bad mood suddenly worse.

Back at the door the bandit was angry beyond belief at the fact this blonde man had the audacity to talk this way to his hostage, and he moved his gun from Annie's head to pressing against the blonde man's temple.

  
"Who the hell do you think you are?" He growled.

The blonde man blinked once, and then he let out a colossal, girly scream. "SCARY!" and turned around to run, unfortunately as he turned around he tripped on the same set of stairs outside the saloon as he had before, and went falling into the brimming golden sand.

"What an idiot." The bandit muttered, and suddenly he grabbed Annie's shoulder once more and began to pull her out of the saloon, but before either of them made it outside, the blonde man jumped to his feet and somehow made it behind them before either of them noticed.  
  
"Hey wait!" Vash called out sadly. "Don't leave yet Miss; you haven't given me your name!"

The brown bandit turned around with a snarl and raised his gun once more, aiming it directly at the blonde-haired man's chest. "You must be suicidal, 'cause ain't no one this damn stupid." (From her seat Meryl gave a muffled laugh, but quickly stifled it. Even if that guy was annoying, she didn't want to see him dead.)  
  


Vash seemed to realized the danger of this situation at last, because what he did next surprised everyone (Meryl most of all).  
  
The blonde-haired man in red did a huge back flip, kicking the brown bandit's gun away as he flew through the air, and landed on his brown boot covered feet onto of one of the poker tables, his silver gun drawn and aimed.

"Hey." Vash said quietly. "Just walk away pal."

The bandit, who was stunned that he was suddenly unarmed and looking down the barrel of a gun, was frightened. He was waiting for the blonde man to pull the trigger, but Vash never did. Instead Vash repeated once again. "Walk away."

The bandit cast an eye to Annie, who mouthed something at him so quickly that no one noticed. No one but Meryl, who couldn't bear to watch the stupid idiot she knew so well act like a hero and had turned away, that is.

"Bastard!" The bandit spat before he turned and ran out of the saloon into the golden-sanded ground. Vash stayed posed on the table with his gun drawn until the man was vanished from the distance before hopping down and running next to Annie so quickly he didn't bother to holster his gun.

  
"Well ma'am, everything has been taken care of!" Vash said in his overly-macho voice once more, obviously trying to impress her. Annie gave a feebly smile and jumped forward and began hugging Vash tightly, and Vash blushed red and hugged her back.

Unfortunately at that moment the sheriff burst inside the saloon, late, as sheriffs usually were. His eyes spotted Annie in the arms of a strange man who held a silver gun, and instantly he brought his shotgun up and aimed it at Vash's head.  
  
"Alright, you're under arrest." He said simply.

"Huh?" Vash blinked. "But I—"

But before he could get another word out, the sheriff, and two of his deputies, had jumped forward. They knocked Annie away and wrestled Vash to the ground, unarming him and trying their best to handcuff him.

None of the many outlaws or bounty hunters seemed to care if this unnamed stranger with the big gun and ace skills was sent to jail. They had, once the bandit was gone, returned to their whiskey and cards. Vash was screaming loudly for help, but no one (save Milly) wanted to tell the police what happened.

"Meryl, shouldn't we help Vash?" Milly asked. "Shouldn't we tell the Sheriff that he helped everyone out?"

Meryl gave a snort. "I think that skirt-chasing idiot will be more of a help to us if he's behind bars. Maybe with him out of the way we can find the real Vash the Stampede."  
  
"But Meryl—"  
  
"It's not like they're _killing_ him." Meryl explained. "They're just getting him out of our hair. Now let's go."  
  
Meryl grabbed her partner's hand and pulled her from the saloon, ignoring Vash's cries of "Insurance Girls!" from behind them. Milly looked put out, but Meryl ignored the donut-loving freak completely.

Everyone else had returned to their lives.

  
Everyone but Annie, who had caught the name "Vash" when Milly had called the red-coated man that, and after seeing how he'd beaten the bandit, she believed that he just might be the legendary Humanoid Typhoon.

She'd have to tell Keith about this when they next saw each other.

**----**

_T_h**a**t **N**_i_**g**h_t_

Meryl and Milly hadn't been able to get out of the town that night, so instead they had found themselves a nice cheep Inn. Of course all their expenses on their Vash hunt were paid for by the Bernardelli Insurance Company. They still didn't think it wise to flaunt their money, one because doing that could get them robbed, and two because the company grew angrier each day that Vash was not found, and they didn't need to spend money from an angry boss.

The Inn room was small and pretty empty. Two beds sat near one another in the main of the room with a small bed-side table between it which held a lamp and a jug of water. There was also a desk in the corner of the room, which was where Meryl currently sat, typing up a weekly report for the company.

Milly was lying on her bed with her back turned to Meryl and occasionally gave small sighs and angry huffs. It was all an old trick to convince Meryl to go bail 'that weird blonde guy' out of jail, but Meryl insisted that sooner or later Annie would go tell them what happened.

Meryl's fingers fell on the keys as she watched the type-writer create the words on her paper she'd have to send to the office. It was very annoying that she had to do this, but it was her job and she took great pride in her work. At least this week she could report that they may not have found Vash, but no cities were destroyed.

"Urgh." Milly breathed quietly.

"You're not going to stop, are you Milly?" Meryl sighed in defeat.

  
"You're not even a little worried about Vash?" Milly asked as she turned around and looked at her friend with a puppy dog look on her hallowed face that made even Meryl give in to Milly's demand. Meryl couldn't even argue that the man wasn't Vash right now. She couldn't stand Milly when she sighed like that.  
  


"Fine. We'll bail him out. Come on." Meryl growled and reached for her cloak that concealed her small arsenal of derringer pistols.

  
"Thanks Meryl!" Milly beamed happily in her dreamy voice.

  
"Yeah, yeah." Meryl shrugged it off. 

**--**

After Milly had changed back into her daywear, she and Meryl had set off from their Inn room through the halls of the old wooden inn that sat above a small bar and down. The girls quickly made it through the lobby and out the front door.

  
Orborio was a quiet town full of quiet people. There was a small market that was open only during the day, and most of the other people around were inside saloons or inns.   
  
The lack of people and lights made the small market rather devious looking. Even if it was a sleepy saloon town, it shouldn't be this empty, should it? No matter. The two insurance agents made quick work towards the jailhouse, which sat at the far end.

"Hey! Insurance Girls!"  
  


Suddenly both Meryl and Milly stopped dead in their tracks and spun around to find 'that weird blonde guy' sitting on the edge of a small wooden stand that had the word 'Donuts' written on a large red tarp that hung above it. Vash had a different donut stuck around each of his fingers, and was currently nibbling on a chocolate one that hung from his right index fingers.

"Hullo Mr. Vash!" Milly said dreamily.

  
"I thought you were in jail." Meryl spoke in a hallow voice that seemed a bit disappointed.

"Naw." Vash laughed. "Miss. Annie came and explained things to the Sheriff."   
  
As Vash spoke of the blonde barmaid he suddenly got a dreamy look on his face and a pink twinge in his cheeks. Meryl had seen him with that same look quite a few times, and it only made her right eye twitch out of annoyance.  
  
"Well I'll be sure to warn Miss. Annie about the huge mistake she made." The shorter Insurance girl said bitterly, and Vash and Milly exchanged confused looks.

"Well, see you later Insurance Girls." Vash suddenly piped up and jumped off the donut stand, not before engulfing the remaining rings that sat around his fingers. "I gotta get back to Miss. Annie's room at the Saloon."  
  


Vash began to walk away and Milly began to say 'goodnight' when Meryl went off like a powder keg. Her eyes narrowed into thin, white slits, and her entire petite body began to shake with anger as she jumped towards Vash and growled in a way that made him think she was a crazy dwarf.  
  
"You've done a lot of sick things since I've met you pal but this is the lowest! You're taking advantage of an innocent young woman who has no clue you're a complete pervert! And I bet you told her you're Vash the Stampede, didn't you? You like people thinking you're Vash, don't you?"  
  


Vash blinked and took a large step away from Meryl. "Hey, I never said I was Vash the Stampede to you two."  
  


"Yes you did!" Meryl shouted in anger.

  
"No." Vash insisted. "That was the big red guy with the Mohawk."  
  
Meryl stopped. True, he had never seriously introduced himself as Vash the Stampede. He had said it when they met him working at the Mansion with Mr. Cliff and Maryanne, but he had been told to say that.

  
"So you admit you're not Vash the Stampede?" Meryl brightened up.  
  
"No, I am Vash the Stampede; I just never said I was to you two."  
  


Meryl sweatdropped and then growled from the bottom of her throat. This blonde guy always brought out the worst in her. He made her so furious, why, not even she knew.

  
"You two would make a cute couple." Milly suddenly said in her usual dreamy voice from behind them. Meryl made a gagging noise and her face twisted into a look of horror and pain at the very idea, Vash, however, looked thoughtful.

  
"Hmm . . . maybe. She'd need a better haircut, though. And some more revealing clothes."  
  


Meryl made a second gargling sound and rounded on Vash like a loose wire. "What did you say you sicko!?"  
  
"It was nice seeing you girls again, but I have to get back to Miss. Annie now. She hired me as her bodyguard, so I have to do my job. Later."  
  


And before Meryl could say or do anything else, Vash was gone, running towards the saloon from earlier faster than a bullet.

**----**

**M**e_a_**nw**h_il_**e** **. _._ .**

While Vash, her new bodyguard, was out doing whatever it was he was doing, Annie had kept busy. After bidding Vash goodbye she hurried up to her room, which was above the saloon, and quickly made her way to the closet.

  
Throwing it open the midnight blue-eyed girl looked down to where there was a large pile of her clothing, and she quickly sorted through it and shifted many lairs of undergarments off a large metal case.

She flicked open the case to reveal a hidden radio, and she quickly grabbed the communicator and brought it up to her mouth. It was just a simple transmitter, mostly a bunch of metal and odd devices that she didn't know the names of.   
  
"Keith, are you there?" She hissed into the radio.

  
There was a moment's pause before a voice spoke over the radio waves. It was a growling, deep voice that was full of anger and bitterness. The same voice the brown bandit had spoke in earlier that day.  
  
"I'm here Annie. What is it? The plan failed, why are you still in that damn town?"  
  


Annie smiled as she heard her lover's voice over the radio and she could hardly contain her excitement. How lucky could she get? Instead of the cash in the saloon tin box, they'd get the sixty-billion double dollar reward.

  
"You know that guy who knocked you out in the bar?" Annie squealed. "Know who he was?"  
  
"No." Keith's annoyed voice came back.

  
"He's _Vash the Stampede_."

There was a long pause following this, and suddenly Keith spoke once again. "Are you sure?"

"Damn sure." Annie laughed sadistically into the radio. "I hired him as my bodyguard. All I have to do is get him alone and put a bullet in his brain and the sixty-billion is ours. I had to tell you baby, we're gonna be rich!"  
  


When Keith next spoke over the radio, it wasn't what she had expected. He sounded worried and anxious.

  
"No Annie. If you blow your cover we can't rob the saloon. I don't believe that idiot was Vash. We have to test him first."  
  
Annie growled with impatience and sighed. "And how will we test him baby?"

Keith's voice was no longer anxious; it was now sadistic and cruel. "I'll call my brother. He'll take care of it."  
  
Annie's face lit up with a twisted kind of pleasure that only the heartless scum of the world can feel. "You mean we're pitting Vash the Stampede against Kenny 'the Groom' Kennedy?"

Keith only laughed brutally in reply, which only made Annie laugh in an equal aggression. Keith's laugh was low and insane, like a rabid dog, while Annie's was high and pitchy like a crazy creature that has just committed a murder.

"Miss. Annie?" Vash's voice suddenly called from the other side of her bedroom door. "I'm back, why is the door locked?"  
  
Annie cursed silently. "Call you back Keith." She muttered and clicked off the radio, recovered it with her underwear and then closed the closet quickly before turning back towards the door.  
  
"Don't come in, I'm not dressed."  
  
A second later the door came bursting open and Vash ran in eagerly.

  
"What the hell are you doing!?" Annie growled at him.

"Err; I thought you said you were in danger. Sorry. Hey! You're not naked!" Vash concluded.

"Get out!" She screamed and grabbed one of her boots and tossed it at him. The boot connected with Vash's head and sent him falling backwards into the hallway where he landed on the ground with a thud. Annie ran over and closed the door on him.

He was annoying alright, but for sixty-billion double-dollars she could handle a little annoyance.

**----------------------**

***Listening to _No Shoes, No Shirt, No Problems_ by Kenny Chesney***

Well, that was chapter one!  
  
What did you all think?  
  


-Ponders-

I hope you all liked it. I tried to keep the characters true to the way they acted in the first five episodes of the show, but I may have made a few little mistakes here and there.

Anyway, next chapter will be up soon, but remember I still have a WHR story I have to finish, so updates will rotate between the two fics.

On the next chapter we get to see more of the mysterious Annie, and Vash fights a bad gunfighter called 'The Groom'.   
  
It's got a lot more action, and a lot more comedy, so please read it, won't you?  
  
Well, I'm out of here folks.

**Ja Ne  
  
~ Golden-sama**

**PS** Big thanks to any of my WHR readers who came and read this. I knew I could count on you guys for you nice reviews.

You know, if I get nice reviews.

  
I hope I get nice reviews.  
  
Please?  
  


***hint, hint***


	2. Thirsty Hitch Hikers

_I_ **L**_o_v_e_ T_h_i_s_ B**a**r

**By **

**Golden-sama**

**Disclaimer**: I don't own **_Trigun_©®™**. It belongs to Sunrise and all other respected owners. Nor do I own the title "**_I Love This Bar_**"©®™, which belongs to Toby Keith.

I do own **Annie©**, **Keith©**, and the **Big Bad K's©**.

**A/N**: Hoorah!  
  
I got some reviews! I love getting reviews! And I got a whole SIX of them!  
  
Wahoo! Six is wonderful for a single chapter, and especially good since this is my first Trigun fic and it is void of Wolfwood and Legato!

Heh. I hope I stayed as true to the characters as I could. I've only seen the few episodes that Adult Swim just showed, but I taped them and I've watched them all at least fifty times, so I think I got them down as well as I could.

Anyway, here's chapter two. Vash continues his righteous quest for skirts and donuts, but along the way Meryl and Kevin Kennedy slow him down.

**----------------------**

It was now the morning following Vash the Stampede's appointment to the new job of personal bodyguard and ace gunman for Annie Branch, the local saloon barmaid in the small town of Orborio. Of course Annie had forbidden Vash to tell anyone who he was, for fear that bounty hunters would come and take her bodyguard away for the sixty-billion double-dollar reward that sat so heavily on Vash's blonde head.

Not that anyone would have believe the skirt-chasing, donut-munching, song-singing, easily-frightened weirdo who now followed Annie around like a stray dog was, in fact, the legendary murderer and gun specialist. Even though the weirdo had proved he had _some_ skills the day before when he defeated the bandit called Keith Kennedy when he tried to kidnap Annie and rob the saloon.

While Vash was busy following his new boss around with a happy (yet slightly perverted) grin on his face, the Insurance Girls known as Meryl Strife and Milly Thompson were on their way out of town, just down in the lobby of their hotel checking out of their rooms. It was obvious that, with the exception of the blonde impersonator, there was no sign of Vash in Orborio.

"Checking out madam?" The clerk, a tall and thin man with black hair and a smug look about him that made him appear superior to those below him, asked in an aristocratic voice.

  
"Yes we are." Meryl sighed rather irritably. She wasn't normally _this_ grouch (though being moody was a common trend with her) but they had spent months looking for Vash with no luck whatsoever. That, and their reunion with the blonde weirdo that annoyed her so much, had put her in a super-bad mood.

"Hey! Johnny!"  
  


"Howdy there Bob."

Two new voices broke the silence, and Milly, who was also interested in things like this, turned around and cast her eyes to a pair of people. One of them was a fat, gray haired man in worn out clothes who was called 'Bob' and was one of the town drunks, while the other, Johnny Bosch, was the town rumor monger. A regular fountain of information, most of which was used for blackmail purposes.

"What's new Johnny?" Bob asked as he took a swig from a whiskey bottle that decorated his hand.

"Vash the Stampede." Johnny smirked at once, which sent a brief quiet spasm through the entire room as many heads (Meryl's included) turned around to stare at the smug John.

"What about him?" Bob asked, now so interested that he put the whiskey down (which was rare for him). "Did someone catch him?"

"Naw." Johnny waved his hand before his face. "But I heard from my cousin that he's on his way to Orborio. So I'd get your guns ready, or get to packing, 'cause you know what they say, 'When Vash comes to town there's Hell to Pay.'"

There was a mute silence in the room, which was broken only by muttering and whispering from the various bounty hunters in the corner who were all incredibly happy by this news, and from the large grin on Meryl's face.

  
So Vash was coming here.  
  
Maybe they'd stay for a couple more days after all.

**----**

**A**c_t_** _I_I**: **T**hi_rs_**t**y Hi_t_**ch** _Hi_k**er**s

**----**

Back at the small Saloon in the center of Orborio town, the old owner, a happy-go-lucky old hippie called Willie, was sitting on a stool behind the bar, his aged eyes looking around at the room. It was still early, and it was still before Annie's shift, which together meant business was slow. But no matter, soon the lovely Annie Branch would be back in the bar pouring whiskey, and his business would be through the roof.

"Hello everyone."  
  
Every head in the bar turned around, including old Willie, as Annie's sweet voice called inside. Her voice was like honey, honey that was sweet and yellow, just like her golden cascades of hair that framed her creamy-white skin with the strawberry blush in her cheeks.

"Hullo Miss. Annie." The entire bar echoed happily as their eyes fixed on the blonde barmaid and nothing else. Old Willie gave a happy smile and stood up.  
  
"Annie, I'm going out for a smoke. You man the fort till I get back, y'hear?"  
  


Annie gave a sweet smile and bowed down low (which made many of the men nearby quickly stand up for a view down her shirt. It was a disgusting idea that every man in there was a pervert, but it was true) and she spoke in her same honey-sweet voice: "Sure Mr. Nelson, you take your time."  
  


As old Willie left the bar with a happy smile to go have a smoke, Annie beamed a wide, honey-sweet smile around the saloon, and then walked back behind the bar. Vash quickly hurried around to the front of the bar and took a seat right in front of Annie.

  
"So Miss. Annie." Vash piped up in his best macho-voice. "Do you have a boyfriend?"

Annie blinked once and then shook her head, giving a small girly giggle that made Vash's heart melt. "No I don't."  
  
"Great!" Vash laughed as he clapped his hands together. "Do you want one?" 

Annie frowned a bit. "Oh that's so sweet of you to offer honey, but I just met you."  
  
Vash frowned and sweatdropped. "Okay. So I don't have to be your boyfriend. Hey, I could be your husband instead!"

"Sorry." Annie bit her lip and put on a pout face that Vash blush a deep crimson as his mind filled to the brim with things he really shouldn't be thinking about at the present moment. Of course mostly every man in the bar was thinking of the same thing.  
  
"No, that's okay. We don't have to get romantically involved. After all, we just met." Vash said in an all-too-pleasant voice. "How about tomorrow? We'll know each other by then."  
  


Annie then did something that surprised Vash. "We'll see." She said, flashing him a sly smile that made his heart, which had already melted, form back together and melt a second time.

  
"Really? Alright!"

  
Vash then broke off into a loud, rather annoying laugh as he sat at the bar, and the outlaws who sat on the cold barstools on either side of him shot him glances of venom. Partially because he was irritating them, and partially because they were jealous of Annie's attention to this weirdo.

The sound of the saloon door opening was heard, and standing at the doorway was Meryl and Milly. Milly had her same dreamy look about her that made it look like her mind was in a far away place, while Meryl had a rather determined smile on her face.  
  
"Hey! Insurance Girls!" Vash blinked and waved them.

  
"Hullo Mr. Vash!" Milly waved back in an even dreamier voice than her face would have made you think.

Meryl acted as if Vash were invisible and crossed over to the bar, shifting all her weight to one leg and crossing her arms over her chest. "Hey, Annie, isn't it?"

"Why yes." Annie called back in her same honey-sweet voice. "Can I help you?"

"You can try." Meryl replied, obviously annoyed to be standing this close to a pack of perverted idiots who swooned over the barmaid, and especially annoyed that one of them was the weirdo in red. "Milly and I want to get jobs here."  
  


"Hey that's great." Vash interrupted. "If you're going to be barmaids it leaves more time for Miss. Annie and me to spend alone."  
  
"Shut up you." Meryl growled and glared at him quickly before turning her eyes back to Annie. "We need jobs just for a few days, there's talk that Vash the Stampede is coming this way, and as official representatives from the Bernadelli Insurance Society, we have to keep an eye on him. So I figured we'd take an undercover approach."  
  
"Oh dear." Annie laughed in a false-loving voice that made the boys swoon but made Meryl feel sick to her stomach. "Vash is already here. This is him." She pointed towards the weirdo in red.

  
Meryl seemed unphased by this and continued to ignore Vash almost as if he was a germ she was trying not to get. "Can we just get jobs, please?"

Annie gave a shrug and looked towards Vash, who nodded his head and winked one of his eyes. When Annie turned back to Meryl she smiled a huge grin that made Meryl want to vomit, but luckily the short woman kept it in.  
  
"Well of course you can have jobs." Annie said happily.

"Thank you." Meryl muttered rather upset. "Can we start today?"  
  
"You can start right now." Annie laughed once again in her falsely-high voice. "Just get in the kitchen and start washing dishes."  
  
Meryl's right eye twitched, as it often did when she was annoyed. Obviously being ordered to wash dishes by this 'blonde bimbo' (as she had dubbed Annie in her mind) was not the job she'd had in mind, but there was nothing she could do about it now, so instead of complaining she only sighed and headed to the kitchen.

  
"Bye Mr. Vash." Milly waved as she followed Meryl.

  
"Bye Insurance Girls!" Vash waved back.

**----**

**-**_Spiegel__Valley_**-**

Not far from Orborio town is a small, sandy stretch of land called Spiegel Valley. It is, as everyone on the planet is, part of the vast desert, and it is, as its name suggest, a valley.   
  
Spiegel Valley was the fastest trade route between Inepril City and Orborio Town, which made it a common route of travel for anyone who happened to be going either way. It was also a common place for thieves and bandits to hide out. Because Spiegel Valley supports high, orange rock walls that raise into the air on both sides of the small brown path, making it easy to attack passersby.

Currently a large armored car was jetting down the road, hurrying as if being chased by some horrible beast lurking beneath the sands. They only went so fast because their car only supported six people; a driver, a guard in the front seat, and four guards in the back.   
  
And it was rumored that the K's were out here.

The Big Bad K's as they were called. An infamous band of bandits in these parts. They weren't so dangerous that they were world famous, yet, but they certainly had the potential. Their leader, 'The Groom', had already worked a hefty one million double-dollar bounty for himself, which had given him quite a bit of fame.

  
Of course he was no Vash the Stampede.

As the armored car continued to roll on, a silhouetted figure appeared in the road before them. First as a blurry shadow in the afternoon heat, but as they drew closer they could see that it was a man. And a man they had hoped not to meet.  
  
He was tall and lanky, with short black hair that was trimmed and spiked up into tiny spikes. He wore on his body a tuxedo, like a man getting married, except this tuxedo was decorated with bullet holes and old bloodstains. The man wore a pair of dark sunglasses and he held a casual smile on his lips and a large black gun in each of his hands.

The guard in the passenger seat went for his gun, and the driver gave a hard turn on the wheel, trying to turn them around, but the man in the tuxedo, 'The Groom', raised both his arms and opened fire. The windows of the armored car smashed open and both the guard and the driver were killed as a barrage of bullets sailed through their bodies.

"Move out." He commanded with a casual laugh.

He was Kenny Kennedy, the 'Groom'.

A second later more shadows of people had appeared and began running towards the armored car, which had spun out of control and smashed head first into one of the high orange rock walls. Running towards it now were three more people, two women and a man.

The first one to reach the car was a woman who wore a red leather jumpsuit. From her neckline to her breasts, the suit was a blazing light red, from there it went down to her waist as a faded brick red, and from her waist down and on her sleeves it was a deep crimson so dark it was almost black. In her hand was a large revolver. Beneath the barrel of the gun were two smaller barrels, each one facing a different direction than the main one.

The back door of the car shot open and two of the guards inside jumped out with their pistols at the ready. The woman in red merely shrugged and pressed a small switch on the butt of her pistol and when she squeezed the trigger two small bullets shot from either of the smaller barrels and killed both of the men before they could get a shot off. 

She was Katie Kennedy, the 'Triple Threat'.  
  


A second figure showed up now. It was the second woman of the group, who was the younger sister of Katie Kennedy. She was dressed, to put in plain and simple, in a dominatrix outfit. Like the kind used for sexual bondage. 

In her hand was a long black whip, which she threw into the car amongst the bullets that flew out. It wrapped around something and someone gave a cry as she tugged the whip and pulled one of the guards out by his neck. The whip was still firmly wrapped around his throat, and the woman in black pressed a small button on the end of the whip. A second later the man screamed as electricity passed through the whip and he fell to the ground, his insides burnt.

She was Kelly Kerry, the 'Desert Dominatrix'.

The final guard screamed and ran out from the back, he had dropped his gun in the same mad panic that had caused the large wet stain on the front of his pants, and he ran down the desert path, trying his best to escape from the two crazed women or the even crazier Kenny behind them.

As the guard ran he spotted the fourth bandit standing before him. He was short and skinny with large round glasses and a bald head that shined in the sunlight. Around his arms and legs were the oddest gloves and boots the guard had ever seen. Both the gloves and the boots were deep silver and appeared mechanical. Running through them were large clear tubes, with a green liquid flowing inside.

The short, skinny man reached down towards his belt buckle, which was also silver and supported four tiny switches: two on the top, two on the bottom, and a fifth that was a round dial in the center. His hand went towards the four switches, but before he could press them a gunshot ran out and the guard fell down dead.

Many heads turned and glared in the distance, but soon those glares turned into happy smiles as the brown bandit called Keith appeared on the distance. The Groom waved and ran over, like a child who had just spotted their best friend.

"Baby Brother!" Kenny yelled as he reached Keith and gave him a huge hug. When they broke apart Kenny smiled warmly at Keith for a second, and then threw a fierce punch into his brother's gut which sent his sprawling to the ground. Instead of complaining, both brothers seemed to be laughing.

  
"It's been a while Ken." Keith laughed as he pushed himself back up onto his feet.  
  
"Sure has. HEY! KATIE! IT'S KEITH!" He yelled over his shoulder towards the woman in red, who was, with the other two, already running over. They all arrived and stood at Kenny's side, except for Kelly, who ran over next to Keith.  
  
"I missed you." She whispered.  
  
"Kelly." Keith spoke in a rather annoyed tone. "You're sister is married to my brother. You gotta stop this kinky fantasy about me."  
  
Kelly pouted and walked back over to stand behind Kenny, who was merely laughing his head off. Katie and the bald brother waved towards Keith, who nodded his head back.  
  
"So what brings you back Keith?" Kenny asked casually, as if they had just finished a supper, instead of having just murdered six innocent people. "You and Annie break up?"  
  


"Naw." Keith shrugged. "Actually we got a pretty good racket going. She gets a job at a bar for a few days, gets the town's respect, then I kidnap her and all the cash. No one follows because they love her too much and they're afraid I'll kill her."  
  


Kenny seemed bored. "Where's the fun if no one shoots at you?"  
  


Keith shook his head from side to side and laughed. "You want fun, bro? Yesterday this little prick beat me good. Disarmed me with a kick and made me look like a freaking moron."  
  


All of the bandits in the circle seemed disappointed, and Kenny's casual smile had melted away and been replaced by a look of deep disappointment. He walked forward and looked into his brother's coco brown eyes with his own eerie green ones, as if trying to see if this was true.  
  
"Is this a joke?"  
  
Keith only grinned. "Nope. But I have an excuse. It was _Vash the Stampede_ who beat me."

Like dropping a stone in a pond, all of the bandits gave an enchanted awe as the name was dropped. Kenny no longer looked at his brother with disrespect, but now he seemed to hold him in higher regard.

"I'll spare you the details." Keith said with a smug smile. "But if you come with me, then that sixty billion is ours."  
  


**----**

**-**_Orborio__Town_**-**

Meryl and Milly were still in the kitchen, white aprons plastered over their regular clothing. Meryl was at the stove, boiling a large pan of water. Milly was near the over, his dreamy face pushed close to the glass that glowed red.

"There's almost done." Milly smiled. "Mmm, can you smell them Meryl?"

Meryl nodded, her regular bad mood temporarily forgotten as the smell of the cooking donuts filled the kitchen. Old Willie, the owner of the saloon, loved donuts so he always had them baked fresh for him. Milly was no chef, but she had done her best job.

As Meryl watched the clear water begin to bubble, first from the bottom, and then slowly at the top of the water, she felt satisfied. No, Vash had not shown up yet, but nothing bad had happened either. They weren't hostages or caught in a gunfight or any of the things that seemed to normally happen to them.

"Done!" Milly beamed dreamily as she pulled a large trey of donuts out of the over and walked across the kitchen, setting it down on the window ceil. Milly took in a deep smell of her creations and she then peeled off the over mitts and walked over to a large bowl of batter, to mix up some more.

"They smell good Mil'." Meryl nodded from where she stood watching the water boil. Her eyes (and nose) directed her towards the smell of the donuts, and for a minute she thought about snagging one of them off the plate, which was proof of just how good a mood she was in if she was willing to do that.

But as her eyes fell on the plate they instantly became wider. The plate was completely barren, no donuts in sight. Her dark eyes flashed from the empty tray to the open window and it took her the better part of four seconds to realize what had happened. Her right eye began to twitch, as it did when she became annoyed, and she grabbed the handle of the pan of boiling water.

"Oh no!" Milly suddenly cried. "The donuts are gone Meryl! A bird must have eaten them . . ."  
  


Meryl gave a snort as she walked over to the open window, the large pot of boiling water in her hand. "A bird or maybe a rat."

  
Meryl stuck the large pan of water out the window and then, in one swift motion, turned it upside down and dumped the contents out below. A second later there was a scream and Vash jumped up, hands full of donuts and hair full of boiling water.

  
"Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey!"

Vash jumped around like a dog who had just burnt its nose on the fireplace waved his arms wildly around. Meryl gave a bit of a satisfied smile and slammed the window shut, ignoring the burning man completely.

  
"I hate that guy." She muttered as she went to refill the pan.

**----**

By the time Vash's head had stopped burning from the boiling water that had been splashed on him rudely by the insurance girls; he had found his way to the alleyway behind the bar. It was a pleasant little alley, not the dark and disturbing kind, but a sunny kind, with a large horse troth.

"Hello Vash."

Vash instantly spun his still-wet head around and spotted Annie, who was walking towards him with a strange smile on her face.   
  
"Miss. Annie!" Vash instantly went red and got a goofy smile on his face as he ran over to her. "How are you?"

Annie walked over to Vash and smiled gently at him before she reached and hand out and ran it over his cheek softly. She wasn't saying anything, which was odd to Vash, but he was really too heart-struck to care.  
  
A second later there was a sound and both Annie and Vash turned around to see a short, bald man in a heavy gray coat appear at the end of the alley. Sweat was cascading off his hairless head, and behind his large round glasses his small, beady eyes were narrowed in pleasure.

  
"Excuse me, do you have anything to drink? I'm very thirsty."

Vash didn't look happy to be disturbed, since this was the first time he'd been alone with Miss. Annie since they'd met, but of course, Vash was the kind of person to help everyone. It was part of his personality, so he only shook his head.  
  
"No, sorry. But there's a saloon over there."  
  
Vash pointed at the saloon to the right, but the bald man didn't even pretend to change his eye's course from Vash. The bald man stripped off his large gray coat to reveal he wore a simple shirt and pants, with large, strange silver gloves and boots.

  
"Foolish Vash the Stampede." The bald man laughed. "Now you shall face Kevin Kennedy, the Hulk Suit!"

Kevin reached down towards his belt buckle, which was also silver and supported four tiny switches: two on the top, two on the bottom, and a fifth that was a round dial in the center. His hand went towards the four switches and he flipped them all. A second later the green liquid that was sitting inside his silver gloves began to light up and turn yellow.

  
"You're a bounty hunter, huh?" Vash pouted as his day with Annie was ruined by the all-too-common reward seeker. Of course he had no idea that this bounty hunter was an outlaw himself and was working for Annie. 

"Foolish Vash the Stampede, you shall soon taste my furious fist of steel!" Kevin shouted with a maniac laugh following.

"Yeah, yeah." Vash shook his head. "Jeez, why is everyone always so melodramatic?"

  
Instead of answering his question, Kevin just smiled a smug smirk onto his lips and suddenly his large boots made of metal began to glow at the very bottom. Vash blinked, but before he could see what was happening, the small man was launched forward, running faster than Vash had ever seen someone run before. Kevin extended a fist, which also began to glow with a yellow light, and smashed into the side of Vash's face, sending the Humanoid Typhoon flying backward and landing in the sand.

When Vash next sat up he was holding his jaw and moving it slowly from side to side in the palm of his hand. "Hey not bad." He said looking up at Kevin. "You're pretty fast."  
  


Kevin smirked and squeezed his hands into fist. As soon as he did the metal gloves began to change, and three long spikes shot out from just above the knuckles on each of them. Then without a pause, Kevin shot forward again, ready to drive his claws into Vash's head.

Vash suddenly became very serious and kicked one of his feet up in the air as fast as lightning. A small knife shot from the tip of his shoe and connected with the three large claws. Vash, who was still sitting on the ground, was holding back the clawed hand with his foot, the tiny knife from the shoe stuck between two of the large blades.

  
"Ho-oh! Very good Vash!" Kevin growled. He smirked and threw a punch with his left arm (since the right one was still trapped by Vash's shoe), but the Humanoid Typhoon used his hands this time. His fingers grabbed onto the right and left spikes and held the glove back. There was a struggle as Kevin pushed with all his might to smash the long claw into Vash's face, but Vash shot his arms out, snapping off the two large blades and he simply twisted his head to the side faster than the wing of a humming bird to avoid the one remaining spike.

  
"What the – impossible!" Kevin breathed as he saw Vash dodge the blade from such a close distance.

Vash hadn't wasted the moment of his enemies surprised; he twisted the two blades around in his hands until he held them like knives, and quickly jammed them into the side of the glove. They punctured the clear veins that were flooded with glowing yellow liquid and suddenly the arm began to shake and vibrate violently.  
  
"No! Damn!"

Kevin jumped backward and quickly released his right arm from its struggle with Vash's foot as he fled from the Stampede a few feet. He then used the right arm to press a small switch, which caused the liquid (which was spurting out from the cut veins) to turn green once more and stop glowing. Kevin then breathed in and out with long breathes for a minute, before he pressed the button again and the glove gave a small "swish" and fell off his arm.

"Excellent Vash the Stampede." Kevin growled between his short panting. "But this game isn't over yet."  
  


Kevin took a fighting stance; he moved his gloved hand out in front of his face and aimed the blades, while moving his bare left arm down to the belt buckle once more. He turned the switch and the liquid, which was once glowing yellow, now began to boil and glow red inside the clear veins of the glove, as did the liquid in the veins of his boots.

  
Vash stood with a deadly serious look on his face and he held the two claws he'd snapped off of the glove in his hands. Kevin screamed and shot forward once again, running faster than any human possibly could on their own, but Vash was still quicker. He jumped upward, landed on Kevin's head, which he used to kick off into the air. As Kevin's head was pushed downward by Vash's feet, the Stampede turned around in mid air and threw the twin claws.

The long spikes pierced the air like meteors and howled with a horrible screech as they went sailing. They slashed into the boots and cut twin clear veins on either side of the metal shoes, causing the glowing red liquid to shoot out like water from a fountain. Kevin screamed as he lost control of his super fast running and tripped on a rock. He fell face first into the horse troth, and was knocked out instantly.  
  
"Well." Vash smiled as he looked up from where he stood on the sandy ground, his serious face dissolving away into a playful one. "You did say you were thirsty."

Annie flashed a quiet, weak smile.

**----**

**L**a**t**e**r** _T_ha_t_ N_i_**g**h_t_ **.** . _._

Annie Branch was back in her hotel room, sitting on the edge of her bed with an upset look on her face. She couldn't believe that Keith had been satisfied sending Kevin alone. She didn't know Kenny or Kevin, Keith's brothers, very well, but she did know that Kevin was the weakest of all the Big Bad K's.

With a sigh Annie stood and began to walk towards her closet. She was going to place a radio call to Keith and complain about their stupidity, when she heard a small tapping on her window and turned to see Keith himself standing on the window ceil.

She gasped out in surprise and ran over, throwing open the window and welcoming him in with open arms and a quick kiss. His coco colored beard tickled her face, as did his equally brown mustache, but she didn't mind. When they broke apart, however, she slapped him.  
  
"You sent Kevin?"

Keith laughed his deep laugh, which was a series of grunts and snickers. "Don't worry Annie my love. That was just to see if he was really Vash. Our real plan to kill him doesn't start until tomorrow morning."  
  


Annie couldn't help but flash a grim and evil looking smile as she leaned in to kiss Keith once again, but before their lips could meet there was a knocking on the door and both of them looked up as Vash's voice floated through the wood.

"Miss. Annie! I just came to check on you before bed."  
  
Annie gave a quiet curse and then, before Keith could even begin to react, she grabbed him and pushed him underneath the bed in one fluid motion that surprised her boyfriend.

  
"Be quiet!" She hissed and then she stood and walked over towards the door, cracking it open ever so lightly and staring out to see Vash standing there like a patient little puppy waiting for it's master who was in their room alone.  
  
"Hello Vash." She sighed.

  
"Hello Miss. Annie!" Vash yelped all too happily.

  
"Vash, now isn't a good time, I'm going to go take a shower in a few minutes. Can we talk when I get back?"

There was a red twinge of guilt in Vash's normally pale cheeks and he nodded his head, almost as if his mind was now someplace else. Annie gave a small huff and then shut the door on his nose. The second it was shut, Vash turned and took off down the halls towards the hotel's shower. (The rooms didn't have individual showers, so instead there was one large bathroom for girls and one for men in the basement.)

Annie turned back around and shook her head at Keith, who had managed to crawl out from under the bed.

  
"The sooner we kill him the better." Annie growled.

**----**

Vash was now casually – all too casually – walking down the hallway that stood outside the doors to both the men and women's shower rooms. He remembered vaguely that the last time he'd done something like this was when he had worked for Mr. Cliff and had been after Miss. Maryanne, a beautiful undercover cop who had caught his eye. Instead of Maryanne he'd found Milly.  
  
Perhaps it was a sign that what he was doing was wrong.  
  
Vash shrugged.   
  
Then the sound of footsteps caught his ears and he quickly dived down behind a large crate, hiding behind it. The footsteps (which he could only guess were Annie's) drew closer, and finally opened the large door and walked inside. Vash couldn't help but grin as he stood and slipped inside the door after Annie.

  
He looked around, but couldn't find Annie anywhere. The room was empty, but then the sound of running water drifted to his ears. He looked around a row of tall, brown stalls and finally he spotted a pair of feet beneath one of them. He could see the shower head spraying down above the stall, which proved that Annie was there.

_Do I dare do this, knowing full well it is wrong and will probably get me slapped or fired?_

Vash paused and thought about this.

_I dare._

Vash ran as fast as he could towards the stall with the feet beneath it and dropped his gloved hands down on the doorknob. Taking one last deep breath he quickly opened the door and peered inside, where he had expected to find Annie.

It was, however, not Annie who stood inside. 

"WHAT THE HELL ARE _YOU_ DOING HERE!?"

Meryl was madder than Vash had ever seen her (and also more naked than he'd ever seen her) as she grabbed the gray cloak she usually wore over her clothes and wrapped it around herself with a growl. Vash sighed and pouted.

  
"Err, hi Insurance Girl."

"YOU COMPLETE SICKO! GET OUT!"  
  
Meryl reached one of her hands under the gray cloak she was now using as a towel and grabbed one of the small Derringer Pistols that she kept hidden under there. She didn't try to shoot him (though she thought about it), but she did throw the pistol at Vash and watched in satisfaction as it smashed into his nose, knocked him backwards, and caused a great trickle of red blood to fall down.  
  
"You know, you're real bitchy. I wasn't even looking for you." Vash complained as he held his bleeding nose.   
  
Meryl didn't seem to take this as comfort. "You're still looking you pervert!"

Vash shrugged. "You're still a woman."  
  


Meryl growled so fiercely that Vash realized she may actually shot the next gun, so he waved, bid her goodbye, and ran from out of the shower.

**----------------------**

***Listening to Kenny Chesney's _The Good Stuff_***

Hey!   
  
Well that's chapter two. I hope you all enjoyed it; I know I sure enjoyed writing it.

I may have gone a tad overboard with Vash and Meryl there at the end, but it was funny (in a slightly perverted kind of way) and as long as it's funny and not **too** OOC, I don't see why you should complain.

Anyway, I'll have Chapter Three up as soon as I can.

  
But don't forget that I have to finish Chapter Twelve of _False Echoes_ first, so it may be a couple days.

  
Anyway, thanks for reading, and thanks for reviewing!

**Ja**** ne  
  
~ Golden-sama**

**PS**. Has anyone noticed the small "references" I tucked away inside the story? Not the obvious ones like the references to the Toby Keith song that this story took its title from, but the smaller ones.

Anyway, just curious.


End file.
